What Kind of Example?

I have a memory from third grade.  Not one of my favorite times in my life nor was it my teacher, but I do remember anytime we left the classroom for recess, lunch, or going to another classroom for an activity there was a sign above the classroom door in yellow bulletin board paper written in black magic marker in large letters.  “What kind of example are you being?”  I look back now and reflect on what kind of example I was to my siblings, my co-workers, and to my fellow man.

I’m the eldest of three children.  I was under the impression that my parents wanted me to be the example that my brother and sister should follow.  As I look back now, I don’t think I’ve been a very good one.  Things like obeying your parents, doing your chores, and being a good student, and other things that the oldest sibling should do.  Both my brother and sister did better in school than I did, and both of them are doing much better in life than I am.  I think they found other influences that made them better people than me.  So, as far as setting an example for them, I don’t think I did a good job in that department.  On that note, I will move to the other part of my life, my years in the workforce.

In my early days of working, my supervisor and my managers put me in positions of authority over my co-workers.  Leadership roles, now that I look back at those days, I don’t think I was able to influence people to do what I wanted them to do was in my wheelhouse.  I think I was chosen for that role because of the example that I set for others.  Being on time, following the task and staying with it even when the boss was not around.  I look to see how being a good example correlates into being a good leader.  I’ve been in leadership positions in Masonic organizations, in the military, and in law enforcement.  I look back at those times and see that I did just a good enough job that I didn’t wreck the whole thing.  There are some parallels in being a good leader and being a good person.  We have people in government and in business who are good people, but not good leaders; and bad people who are good leaders but not good people.  We see a lot of the latter portrayed in the latter version of this scenario.  I’m not sure where I fit into these groups, but I like to think I’m a good person and a good leader when the opportunity arises.  Which leads to the last part of this examination of character, being a good person.

We all want to be examples of good human beings. I’m not a religious person by any means.  I went to church as a child and was familiar with a few Bible verses.  One of my favorite verses that sticks with me is Matthew 5:16, “Let your light shine before man and that he may see your good works, and glorify your Father who is in Heaven.”  The other verse in Matthew that is drilled into us not only in a religious setting, but in school and in everyday life, Matthew 7:12 “Do unto others and you would do unto them.”  I do try to live my life by the last verse, but in today’s society we also live by another axiom, “Don’t get mad, get even.”  Why do we as human beings go out of our way to make each other miserable?  Why is it more difficult to treat each person with dignity and respect when it’s easier to yell and blame the person who is trying to help you because they believe that they are trying to do you wrong?  Anger is an easier emotion than being kind and considerate to others.  I look back and I have been in both classes of people.  I have tried my best to do good work and treat others with respect, but I have also been on the receiving end of chewing a person out that does not deserve it.  So I can say that I’ve not done well on that end though I try to.

In conclusion, I don’t think I set a good example for my siblings because they have both done better in school and in life better than I have, so I can’t hang my hat on that example.  I have found that being a good example in the workplace does not always make you a good leader later on.  And trying to be a good example as a human being is a difficult road because we all live by different rules for governing their life.  So as I now look back on that sign in my third grade classroom, “What kind of example am I being?”   My answer to that question is the best one I can be.